Personal

It has been mentioned to me that I seem to take some of the comments on this blog very personally. Even when someone is writing about someone else, I seem to get defensive.


Guilty as charged.


When I handed out this blog address I gave it to VERY specific people who I thought knew enough about my story to know things that I, or others who come here might take offence to. However, before the back story to this blog could be fully finished the address was given to some people who may not know all of my story. People who may or may not know what it is like to live in an alcoholic / addict situation.


The error is mine. I left the blog open because I wanted anyone who needed to be able to find it to do just that. I wanted anyone who is suffering to be able to find this blog and have a safe place to land, even if it is only for a momment.


I realize now that in doing that, I opened myself up to comments I was not ready to receive. In hindsight I would have not given anyone the address until the entire backstory from 1996 - present was written. But seeing as I am now working on that at a turtle's pace that could be awhile.


So for now, I want to explain myself a little and give those of you who are new a bit to think about. For me, the comments on this blog are very personal.


To quote from one of my favorite movies:


It wasn't personal. What is that supposed to mean? I am so sick of that. All that means is that it wasn't personal to you. But it was personal to me. It's *personal* to a lot of people. And what's so wrong with being personal, anyway? Whatever else anything is, it ought to begin by being personal.

When you make a comment about something someone says you should make it as personal as possible. If you wouldn't say it to their face, you shouldn't write it on this blog. What you see here may be only half of a picture.

I come here because this is my safe place to fall and sometimes I fall really hard. I spend so much of my everyday life being happy and positive that sometimes I just need a place to come to let the rest of the junk out. But what I say here, is only half of my life. I write about the parts of my life that are affected by alcoholism / addiction. I'm not going to come on this blog and brag about how when I got home tonight my husband had cleaned the kitchen and made dinner. I will however be logging on when he has yelled at me or called me names or when he was lying on the couch while I was cleaning the house.

Things that I have not gotten to tell you about yet: being picked up and thrown across a room, staring down the barrell of a shotgun, dragging my 6 week old son to drug houses, leaving my son "home alone" to chase my husband down.

People in horrible situations often do horrible things. It is neither my place nor yours to judge the decisions that people make. This website is filled with people from all walks of life and I just ask that you consider that when you are making comments.

So, I guess to wrap up this long wrambling post I just want people to understand that this blog is very personal to me. And if you are going to make a comment on here, you better understand exactly who it is you are commenting about and what it is you are commenting about and if you don't know, then ask. There is an e-mail address over there on the right.

And if you still don't know than I would suggest that you practice one of the wonderful Al-anon principals and just pass on making a comment until you fully understand the person's situation.