Loss of a Pet

Four days after we officially became an item my dog died. It was a tragic day that I will never forget. I got a call from the office that I needed to meet my mom outside right away but no one would tell me why. So I went outside and stood on the corner waiting for her.

She pulled up in her old beat up car and as soon as I looked in the window I knew something was terribly wrong. There on the front seat sat my beloved dog. My puppy whom I got as a present for my 16th birthday was there but something was not right.

When I looked closer I noticed the blood and then the bone. His hip bone was sticking through the skin and out of his body. For such a serious injury I remember thinking that there should be more blood.

When I got into the car he tried to get closer to me and he wimpered in pain. By this point I was crying. What was going on? As we headed to the vet's office my mom explained to me that he had been following a trailer out back to the dump pile and he had tried to "heal" the tire. He got a little too close and had been rolled under the trailer.

The whole way there I kept thinking that he wasn't bleeding too badly, the doctor would just fix his hip and we would go on our way. However, when we got there the vet informed us that my puppy was parilized from the waist down. That even if he fixed the injury he would never walk again and that for this breed of dog with such high energy it would be devistating.

Then I had to choose. Let him live with no quality of life, or watch him go. This wonderful dog that I hadn't had nearly enough time with. The one that I got happy meals for and who slept with me and went every where with me.

As I sat there crying holding his head the vet gave him the shot. Then we wrapped him in a towel and took him home to be burried. I remember as soon as we got home Impossible Dream Man (IDM) was waiting for me. He was crying and I hugged him as he told me how sorry he was.

I should have stayed. Taken the rest of the day off, mourned my loss, but instead all I could think of was getting back to school. Back to DH. I was back by lunch time but the reaction I got was not one of sympathy or compassion. It was simply, wow, that sucks. Ok, I'm going to sit with my friends now.

As soon as he said it, as soon as I knew that was all I was getting I wanted to run back home and crawl into bed. But, I had comitted to being there that afternoon so I stayed and pretended nothing was wrong even though inside I was dying. I stuffed it down and decided to be strong instead.