How do you know when you've fallen out of love with someone? He called last night alright, promised to see me this afternoon then cancelled to be with D the scum from hell.
I saw him, for a minute and I know he'd been drinking and probably smoking pot. I don't know what it's like not to love DH, but if it's possible that's probably where I'm at.
Everyone wants him to live with me and I just want to forget he ever exhisted. I can't say I hate him, but right now I dispise him.
Everything he does makes me sick! I'm in a three-year relationship with a man I don't know and never see.
I can't call him because I just left him fifteen min ago and he said he's call me when he got home. That could be 11:30 for all I know!
I think I will always lover him but I'm am not in love with him anymore and I don't know if we can get that back.
God I hate my life!!
Tuesday, July 20, 1999
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