Engagement

Sometime in the summer of 1998 my parents got a phone call I will NEVER forget. Someone called to tell them that IDM was engaged. I remember them telling me like it was no big deal. They had no idea that somewhere, in the back of my mind, I kept hoping he was my way out.

When they told me that my heart just SANK. I remember going to my room and crying and crying. I could not figure out why he would marry her if he had just been broken up with her a few months earlier. It was a few more months before I found out she was pregnant.

Part of me gave up the day I found out he was getting married. There was a part of me that just stopped fighting, stopped raging against what I hated in my relationship and just accepted that was my life and that was what it was always going to be.

18 years old and I felt like there would be no one else out there worth looking for so I gave up. Is it possible to go back in time and shake your former self??